Friday Funny
I got an email this morning demanding I bring back the Friday Funny, and it needed to start today. I shall honor that request (since there was also an offer of food included) with a joke I got from a friend last week.
One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe turned to his friend Mike behind him, "My elbow hurts like crazy. I think I'll have to visit the doctor." Mike frowned and replied, "Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money. There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell what's wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and cost ten dollars; a lot cheaper than a doctor."
Joe was very curious. He deposited a urine sample into a jar and took it to his local Wal-Mart. He deposited ten dollars into the machine and the computer lit up and asked for the urine sample. He poured it into the open slot and sat down to wait. Ten second later the computer ejected a printout:
You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks. Thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart.
That evening, still amazed how this new technology worked, Joe began wondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed up some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and his own sperm sample for good measure. He then hurried down to Wal-Mart very eager to see the results.
Joe entered his ten dollars, poured in the concoction, and waited for the results. After ten seconds the computer printed out the following:
You have hard tap water; get a water softener. Aisle 9.
Your dog has ringworm; bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. Aisle 7.
Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
Your wife is pregnant; twins. They aren't yours, get a lawyer.
If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better.
Thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart.
Have a great weekend everyone.
One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe turned to his friend Mike behind him, "My elbow hurts like crazy. I think I'll have to visit the doctor." Mike frowned and replied, "Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money. There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell what's wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and cost ten dollars; a lot cheaper than a doctor."
Joe was very curious. He deposited a urine sample into a jar and took it to his local Wal-Mart. He deposited ten dollars into the machine and the computer lit up and asked for the urine sample. He poured it into the open slot and sat down to wait. Ten second later the computer ejected a printout:
You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks. Thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart.
That evening, still amazed how this new technology worked, Joe began wondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed up some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and his own sperm sample for good measure. He then hurried down to Wal-Mart very eager to see the results.
Joe entered his ten dollars, poured in the concoction, and waited for the results. After ten seconds the computer printed out the following:
You have hard tap water; get a water softener. Aisle 9.
Your dog has ringworm; bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. Aisle 7.
Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
Your wife is pregnant; twins. They aren't yours, get a lawyer.
If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better.
Thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart.
Have a great weekend everyone.
posted by Sam at 11:40 AM
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